I'm home, but it's not that easy.

I have been home since Monday afternoon, and I have a BL friend here taking care of me. It is not easy. My recovery has been very difficult; at one point about 10 days ago the doctor in charge of the section I was in told me I had 12 hours left and should be prepared. He was wrong, but it was a hell of an emotional blow. Here, in a nutshell, is what happened. After my surgery I started to get worse instead of better. I went to the local hospital emergency and was instantly imprisoned (grin). I had blood clots in my leg and in my lungs. They started the usual heparin treatment, not fully understanding that I have a blood clotting problem (low platelet count). The result was massive internal bleeding of almost everything. Several transfusions didn't help at all. They stopped the heparin and adiminstered vitamin K (antidote) and I was transported to a large regional hospital where they were able to offer much more sophisticated diagnosis and treatment. I had ultrasound, doppler ultrasound, barium, CT and MRI scans. They installed (temporarily) a stent umbrella filter in my superior vena clava to prevent clots travelling upwards. They drained some of the deposited blood from the internal bleeding but not all (since it was largely distributed). After my hemoglobin began to rise again, and my vital signs were stable, I was allowed to come home. A nurse comes in daily to take blood samples and vital signs, offer advice, etc. I'm on Dilaudid (hydromorphone - similar to morphine) for pain and stress relief. There is a large amount of pressure and discomfort from the "bruising" (internal bleeding) that will take 3 or more weeks to be reabsorbed naturally. In the meantime is it possible only to lie on my back, though I can sit up for a few minutes at a time. Progress is very slow, and seems to come and go in that I'll feel much better one day, then a few hours later much worse. It'a the worst time I've ever had in my life, bar none. I have a shitload of emails that may not be answered for weeks (so don't be disappointed) and I may not even be well enough to check responses here for several days. I'm not ignoring you, especially those who have been so generous with their good wishes. I'd also particularly like to thank the BL who came from over 1000 miles away and stayed 7 weeks to take care of things, and who is coming back in about 10 days to see me through until I'm OK again. I have never, ever, found such a wonderful friend. There is no way I can ever say thanks enough. I also give special mention to the BL fried who is staying with me for the couple of weeks in the interim; I'd be lost without him too. I'll be back when I can. Feeling pretty poorly right now. Dilaudid would make me feel better, but I don't want to end up with an opiate addiction so I'm taking as little as I can get away with (about 1/2 of what I have been prescribed). Love, Tangie